A heartbreaking farewell letter from Romain Gary to his lost love. 1939.

Romain Gary (1914.1980)

Autographed card signed to Christel Söderlund.

A 24mo page on the back of a greeting card depicting a pilot waving from his plane, flowers in hand. The card has been crossed out in ink by Gary.

Avord Air Base. December 31, 1939.

“…tonight, the memories are furiously attacking me…”

A heartbreaking farewell letter to Christel, his lost love. Stationed at the Avord military base, a solitary Romain Gary is struck, on New Year's Eve, by passionate memories of his inconsolable love. On the eve of the tragic events of 1940, desperate and alone, the writer is gripped by despair.

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Christel,

Tonight, I'm reflecting on my past—which was our past—and I sadly realize that I haven't yet managed to turn the page. So, I'm writing you this note, without hope or fervor, like knocking on the door of an empty house. Why? I don't know. I feel that there's no one, no one, behind the door.

I expect nothing. But tonight, the memories are attacking me furiously… And I am weak with these memories, so weak! I can do nothing against them. They overwhelm me. They throw me to my knees. They strike me on the head. They seize me by the throat… Goodbye. Romain.

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Romain Gary met Christel Söderlund-Kryland, a 21-year-old Swedish journalist, in Nice in July 1937. Gary's first great love, their passion was all-consuming and brief. After a few months together, Christel (who would later inspire Gary's character Brigitte in *Promise at Dawn *), already married, returned to her native country in June 1939 to resume her life as a wife to the musician and composer Axel-Bror Söderlundh. Gary never forgot this passion.